3.29.2009

Boiling over...

I feel so tense... so frustrated like I am going to explode. I feel like I do not want anyone to even talk to me. I wanna eat til my frustration is sub sided but I will not. I am going to eat my bowl of mac-n-cheese and go upstairs. Then I am going to read and take notes in a quiet environment. I tried to tell my hubby I was feeling upset and his response was "About what now?" So I didn't bother to even share.
So I figured I would vent here. Then maybe I will feel a little less like eating. Because right now all I can think about is the big bag of cereal in the pantry and how great it would taste. Maybe one bowl but more than likely two would definitely give me a fix.
Any how, I digress. I feel like my weekends are a big F&*%*g waste of time. They just mean I get to sleep in a little bit later and get to see more of my family. That should be a good thing right. Well lately it has just meant I get to clean up after more people. It is like it is too much to ask people to push in a chair, put their plate in the sink, or put away food after they make themselves something to eat.
My husband gets to spend hours working on his car while I take care of the kids. Then once they get to bed he spends EVERY Saturday night in the garage hanging with his brother. What do I do you ask? I watch TV or browse the internet while I watch TV...ALONE. Sometimes my daughter sits with me but not always. It has been this way pretty much since we moved here in 2007. I pretty much hate Saturday nights as if you can't tell. I know it seems a bit silly...but tell me how do you spend your Saturday night...?
I didn't get to workout today. But I will make it for it 2morrow. I also bought my food for the week and I am hoping I can eat better this week so I can see the scale really make a move. That would help my mood. I am going to take the test to be a personal trainer. I want to get ACSM certified. So i bought the certification guide and a notebook to take notes in. I want to be able to help women like me get in shape.
Anyway... thanks for letting me ramble on. I am going to study now.

3 comments:

  1. Thank goodness!

    I spend almost every night alone, my boyfriend goes to sleep waaay early(be up early for work) and I feel like I take care of most of the house. Honestly, I often feel like a desperate housewife because I just get so lonely. So Im sorry for what you are going through, but at the same time, I am glad someone knows what its like too you know?

    I hate dishes. Every time I turn around there are more. This weekend, I didnt do any but I know thats bad because tomorrow its going to be worse.

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  2. I completely understand what you guys are saying. I'm severly lacking in the friend department because I moved here to be with my now husband. We have friends, but most of them are his and I don't really have any "girl friends" that I can hang out with regularly.

    Good luck with the PT stuff! This is my first time visiting your blog. I hope you feel better soon.

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  3. I totally understand how you feel. My hubby complains that he is tired all the time...Well, when I was working full time (40 hrs), taking care of the house, making sure dinner was made when I got home, along with taking care of our daughter, I would just get p'oed. Now, because I lost my job, I'm home with our daughter, but it is a full time job taking care of your children and the house. Hubbies, SOs, boyfriends, etc. don't get that.

    BTW, This is my first visit to your blog. I like it. :-)

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