New Year (again)

Always had this weird love hate relationship with the end of the year & the coming of the new year.  I like looking back and seeing all the things that I did and accomplished. There is always some regret attached to the end of the year as well. In addition, there's always a new resolve to be better be stronger be smarter be or do more. This year is no different. I can easily see all the changes in transformations and events of 2015. Yet I could also see the lack in the year of 2015 as well. So again I resolved my mind and begin to think about what I want 2016 to entail.

Alone

Let me confess I am on my feelings right now so the tone of this blog maybe a tad bit blah. But it gets like that sometime. I am up bright and early at a Spartan event. The event is the Spartan tv show by NBC. My husband was supposed to go with me but he needed to keep working on the cars. So here I stand at an event that I am interested in, excited about all by myself. 

It made me think about my fitness/weight loss/plastic surgery journey. I have had the love and support of several people through my life moments yet in the end I am on my own and left to get it done on my own. Part of me is sad and that fact while another part is proud of it. I have to accept my progress... My success ... My results are in my hands and my hands alone. 

I need to acknowledge my strength, my ability, & my intelligence and how I am enough  to achieve my goals. 

All on my own. 

Human Factor

I am still working through this chapter. I swear it is like eating my vegetables. It talks about the 'human factor' ad how it a can and does effect the change process. There are 2 types of human factors internal and external. I am the internal factor and the people in my life are the external.

Here is how my feedback/response to this...

Internal _all Me
-tendency to procrastinate
-desire/love of sweets
+like to meet people
+like to try new things
+easy to get along
+ability to make a workout plan



External
Hubby
Younger kids
Older daughter
Older son
Mother
JS-friend

Confession

Well I am stuck. Actually it's not about being stuck it's about facing some truths that I don't or won't or can't or choose not to deal with at the moment in terms of making real change. The chapter that I'm supposed to be reading I have briefly looked at and that's it. And that's the problem in a nutshell it is a chapter that talks about the human factor. The human factor is actually the biggest factor that I think can positively and or negatively affect the changes that I want to make in terms of improving my health. 

So far from my reading I know there are internal factors and external factors I am the internal factors and all the other humans in my life are the external factors. That in and of itself is challenging to be very honest with myself about why I do certain things or even be transparent about the things I do that hinder my ability to truly reach optimal health. 

So in an attempt to take baby steps let's at least list my stuff if I can and then I'll just list the people in my life and then I will later address their connection or their relation are there how they factored into my Health goals. 

Internal (MY) issues

-Procrastinator

-Inconsistent

-Lack of knowledge 

External - other people

Husband

Younger kids

Maya 

Skyler

Mom

Friends

Ohhhh sleepy will continue later.